My Sweet Valentine

I came downstairs a few minutes ago to help Mark unpack the groceries he’d gotten and there on the counter was a big bouquet of flowers.  “I thought you might want to enjoy them over the weekend.”  “Oh!  How pretty!”  I threw my arms around him for a kiss.  He looked a bit embarrassed by the fuss.  How well we know each other, on this our 35th Valentine’s Day together.

I still see the remnants of the shy, young man I first met. His bright blue eyes looking so intently into mine.  I remember how I lamented that we had no “history”, no memories to look back onto.  Now they tumble out like the Valentines shook from a decorated shoe box.

There have been many beautiful red roses, heart shaped boxes with chocolates, and gifts of jewelry over the years.  I usually protest it’s too much, and he always says it’s not enough.   Besides our first Valentine’s Day when we both declared our love for the first time, our most memorable Valentine’s was 1982.  That was the day we started our family!  That was the day I flew to Reno and picked up our beautiful daughter.  Bringing her back to Kansas City, I couldn’t take my eyes off her.  When he met us at the airport, seeing the look on his face was the best Valentine’s Day gift I ever got.

Becoming a family always changes you.  I once hired a pregnant assistant who proclaimed that having her baby wouldn’t change her.  I told her if it didn’t, she’d be the worst Mother ever.  It does change you.  You see yourself differently, so of course, your husband sees you differently too.  But Mark makes me feel like I’m still the young girl he fell in love with.  He always tells me I’m beautiful.  Even when I had baby poop on me, even as I gained weight with the pregnancies and didn’t lose it, and even when I was mean to him.

That’s the thing I feel worst about.  I’m mean to him.  I don’t know why I do it.  There’s an old song “You always hurt the ones you love”.   But there’s no excuse for it.

When you know someone well, you can hurt them with a  comment that would go unnoticed by anyone else.  You can chuckle at a mishap, or make fun of a shortcoming.  I thought I would never do such a thing, but I have.  The sad thing is that Mark is the nicest person you would ever meet.  I know him better than I’ve ever known anyone, and I’ve never known him to be unkind.   He’s always nice.   That’s one of the things that I love best about him, and one of the things that annoys me.  He’s too nice to everyone.

His faults are that he is too nice, too smart, and too good to everyone.  I really married a wonderful man.  He just was called to audition for Jeopardy because he’s so smart.  He’s started doing plays with me so we’d have something to do together.  He works at my office taking on all the problems so I can concentrate on dentistry.  He’s the best Dad to our kids.  He does so many things for me to make my life easier and happier.  He’s funny and laughs at my jokes even when they’re not that good.

This Valentine’s Day we will start the evening watching Jeopardy’s big computer challenge event.  Of course Jeopardy would schedule that on Valentine’s Day.  But true to course, Mark has been getting Tivo working on our computer so we could record it if we need to.  I don’t usually get Mark much of a gift.  He always says Valentine’s day is more for the guy to buy something for his lady.  I guess my gift will be that I won’t make him wait to watch Jeopardy recorded.  We will watch it in real time!  I’ll cook a nice dinner for afterwards and try not to talk while he watches Jeopardy.

He really is my best Valentine ever.  Love you, Marko.